I feel like every community, city, or state has it’s own animal folk talk. Remember in “Grumpier Old Men” there was that huge fish “Catfish Hunter” that they always wanted to reel in but ultimately release? Scotland has the Lochness Monster, America has Bigfoot, Australia has…..”Michael Jackson”. Michael Jackson was the nickname given to a rare Pale headed crocodile out in Australia. Everyone in the North of Australia new about this thing. He had a Pale head and dark body, so they figured Michael Jackson was an awesome name.
Now “Michael Jackson” couldn’t moon walk, he couldn’t sing, he didn’t have an amusement park in his swamp with an inviting feriss wheel for children , but he made up for all that by doing the One thing he could do…..absolutely fuck shit up. Scientists from across Australia knew about him, locals respected his gangster, tour guides knew not to test him…and yet this poor middle aged guy had to be a hero and go into the water after sundown when his fishing line got tangled. I wouldn’t jump into that river for my own Mother knowing there’s a 10% chance Michael Jackson is out there. I’m just trying to understand this guys calculus and what went through his head. You’re going to risk your life for a tangled fishing line knowing there’s a crocodile out there named Michael Jackson with a White head and Black body, missing Two legs and a giant scar across his belly? You know why he’s missing legs and has a scar across his belly? He’s the baddest motherfucker on the river that’s why! Michael Jackson is the dude in the back of the bar telling stories to locals about bar fights, one night stands, Vietnam, and midnight games of Russian Roulette with Two bullets in the chamber just to make it interesting. Of all the crocs in Australia you go and test Michael Jackson bro??? And you’ve got your wife with you! She doesn’t need to see that shit. Just reckless. After looking at the photo of this thing I wouldn’t even be in the same area code as him, let alone the same river. No chance. And yes that’s a real picture of Michael Jackson aka the first ingredient in a nightmare.